Sunday 4 January 2009

Interest Rates to Hit Record Low

A Bank of England spokesperson confirmed last night that the extent to which the banking system was working in the public interest was at an all-time low.

The message was given amidst widespread speculation that Mervyn King will announce another drop in interest rates this week.

"It's official. We bankers just do not give a shit about anything other than lining their own pockets.

"If we keep our interest nice and low then maybe the problem will fix itself.

"The most important thing is that everybody stays calm, and doesn't demand ridiculous and rash measures like better financial regulation.

"The public can rest assured that while they lose their jobs and homes and their family starves on the street, our bonuses will remain absolutely untouched."

No comments:

Post a Comment